Monday, October 1, 2012

Graduation Part Deux - and the time I almost killed my husband with Lipton Tea.

This last Friday I FINALLY earned my BS in Business Administration, graduating with high honors. Contrary to blogging belief, words cannot describe what this accomplishment means to me. After a how-many-year hiatus, multiple changes in major, and earning an associates degree in a completely unrelated field, I am so glad went back and stuck through it. While I could not have made this achievement without the immense amount of support from my friends, family and coworkers, it is my husband to whom I owe the most gratitude. He was so patient with me and my crazy schedule, never complained about entertaining the kids while I did homework, and always told me to "suck it up" or "you'll be fine" when I was on the verge of a near-meltdown.

Speaking of JP...

He has been sick with an awful cold for going on a week now. After the graduation ceremony last week we went out with my parents to dinner. They noticed his cold, and I proceeded to tell them of a little incident that occurred around this time last year - when I almost killed my husband with Lipton tea.

When men are sick they are the most god-awful creatures to be around. Rather than suffering in silence, they (JP) find it necessary to make the entire house aware of how miserable they are feeling while they (JP) lay around the house like a sloth.

In addition to the various medications and vitamins JP uses in attempt to cure himself, he likes to drink tea. He will generally heat water in a mug in the microwave and go about his tea-making way. Last winter he sent me to the store to buy a box of Lipton tea bags. I went to Target, made my purchase, and brought them home.

When JP proceeded to open the box he and I both thought the bags looked a bit unusual, but thought maybe after half a century Lipton decided to redesign their product. No big deal.

After drinking two mugs of the new tea, JP became even more ill than he was earlier in the day: dizzy, heart racing, shaking, sweating, and weak. It was only after acquiring these new symptoms that JP checked out the Lipton box...where he discovered that I bought tea bags that were designed to make an 8-cup pitcher of iced tea...and really shouldn't have been used in a single coffee mug. In essence, my husband consumed the caffeine equivalency of 16 cups of iced tea within about 30-45 minutes.

Now, the "lethal dose" of caffeine is quite substantial and generally runs about 150-200 milligrams per kilogram of body mass depending on who you ask. This is the approximate equivalence of 80-100 cups of coffee. Technically speaking JP only drank 16 cups, so it really wasn't enough to kill him...but it still makes for a good story.