Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Make My Week Wednesday

With the everyday stress of work and family added to the mounting pressure of squeezing 12 weeks worth of assignments into 10 weeks to make the deadline for September graduation, it’s the little things in life that really make me happy.

MONDAY - Exhausted from being woken thrice by my human alarm clocks the night before and running late for work, I ::gasp:: went through the drive-thru at our local coffee shop. Although some consider this a blasphemous deed (::cough:: Kenny ::cough::), I didn’t have time for to wait for the caffeine-fiending idiot that I’m positive would have been in line in front of me indecisive of which drink will adequately deliver.


As I pulled up to the window to pay, I was handed my order and was informed that the kind soul ahead of me had paid for my drink. An angel may have died, but I got free coffee.

And this is kind of unrelated, but as I was eating lunch in the 6x6 cave that we at work refer to as the break room, I looked out the single window which faces the parking lot of the eye clinic next door. As I was people watching and enjoying my sandwich, this creepy beat-up grey conversion van comes barreling into the parking lot. Normally, I wouldn’t have taken a second glance…except on this particular van, written in smeared white window paint, were the words “free candy”. Nice.

Sunday, July 25, 2010


Some good ones from the weekend...

::Back Story:: I told Jack that he wasn't going to get a snack if he didn't eat his dinner...

Mom, when you say stuff like that to me (long pause) it's humiliating.

::Back Story:: Grandpa was getting the T-Ball stand out of the garage. The base fell off of the stand as he was carrying it into the yard.

::said in the most serious of tones:: Great. You broke it. Great. Thanks. ::walks away into the house::

::Back Story:: Husband was holding Reese when we got to my parent's house on Sunday. Reese started to squeal when Grandma was talking to her.

Grandma, I think she hates you.

Friday, July 16, 2010

Kids are gross.

Kids are gross. I say this in the most lovingly way possible.

Let me start off by taking a stroll down memory lane to this post. For those lazy readers, I will paraphrase by saying that my daughter spits up so much food it’s hard to believe that she gains weight at all. It is estimated that at least 50% of her daily caloric intake ends up on the floor, the dog, or Husband and I.

Tuesday night was no different.

About an hour and a half after Reese’s main entrĂ©e of pureed mixed veggies and banana/mixed berries for dessert, we sat down on the couch together for an attempt at one last snuggle time with her bottle before bed.

::Side Note:: I say “attempt” because doll has recently learned to crawl. The girl is always on the move. She has absolutely no time in her agenda to slow done and cuddle with Mama. I thought I had at least 12-13 years before that happened.

Anyway, using the TV remote as a distraction, I finally got her to chill out and take the bottle. She was about ¾ of the way through when she gagged and spit up on me. Not a huge deal, but nevertheless needed Husband to take her so I could clean myself off before Calv and his laser tongue decided to help.

Husband picked her up off my lap and at the exact moment he turned to carry her away it happened. What was quite possibly the largest stream of projectile baby food / formula blend shot out of doll’s mouth. The vom covered an estimated four-foot radius; spraying herself, husband, Calv, both couches, and my carpet.

Now, we’ve had carpet/baby food incidents before and this one wouldn’t have been a huge deal – but do you recall what she had for dessert? Bananas with mixed berries. And what color is said bananas with mixed berries? Purple. On my WHITE carpet. Super.

She definitely put Linda Blair to shame.

After two days, a cry for stain-removing suggestions via Facebook, and a little help from Google, I was able to successfully able to remove most of the stain with a mix of household items: Tide, vinegar, and warm water. There was still a faint purple look which was completely wiped out with OxyClean gel stain remover (let sit 5-10 minutes, rinse with warm water, and blot up with a towel). The stain remover is actually meant for clothes, but I was brave and tried it.

And if you are from any of the companies that created any of the aforementioned cleaning supplies, hit me up and I’ll let you know where you can mail my royalty check (or lifetime supply of said items) for plugging your product. k thx.

Monday, July 12, 2010

I heart my DVR.

I just realized that the day I graduate is the same day of the season premieres of Grey's and Private Practice. It was meant to be.

My Burnin’ Loins and the 2.5 Seconds I Resembled Siobhan Magnus

I have realized that I am really bad about timely posting, but I can rationalize this by saying that life isn’t always timely.

Moving on…

We had an awesomely awesome Fourth of July getaway at our family cabin in Hayward, Wisconsin. The four and a half days of sun, alcohol, food, family, fireworks, and laughs were much needed.

I even got to go fishing with my Dad and Husband and on the first day proceeded to catch the only fish worth catching; only to have my fishing line snap just as its bass lips reached the surface of the water. Husband obviously doubted my abilities and deemed my two-pound test line as adequate despite my protest that I would undoubtedly reel in the catch of the day. Oh well. Everyone has their own “one that got away” story, mine just happens to be about a fish.

All that time spent on the boat also led to another unfortunate incident.

::Back Story:: I am the fairest skinned girl you will ever cross paths with. I think it’s a combination of being from Minnesota, and the fact that I have a sun allergy wicked enough to confine me to a hotel room during my 11th grade spring break trip to the Bahamas. But that’s a whole other story.

Let’s do some math.

White meat + reflective lake sun + SPF 4 tanning lotion applied liberally + 4 hours on a boat = Burnin’ loins. Literally.

Exhibit A.

Yes, it was as painful as it looks, but not enough to ruin my vacation!

Friday, July 9, 2010


::Back story:: My stepdad is about 6ish years younger than my Mom. Husband calls her a cougar.

Jack referred to my Mom as "Grandma Cougar" about three times in the car this morning. This is not good.